Values are centric to our fundamental belief frames, and they have pretty firm boundaries. Our values and identity are intrinsically linked.
Our values guide our thoughts and behaviour, being the nucleus of our belief atoms. Values help us determine and identify what is important to us. They describe the personal qualities we choose to operate from and define the kind of person we aspire to be. What’s more, we treat ourselves and others within the boundaries of our values.
In my mind, we have 3 sets of values. Firstly, we have core values. These are the rules or ethics we learned at a very young age. Those values indicate what is most important to us and if someone else challenges them we react emotionally. Secondly, we have general values, matching the description in the second paragraph. Those values change depending on the context. For example, we may have different values in our careers and in our romantic relationships. Thirdly, we have the values of social evolution. This type of value drives our behaviour and thought patterns. The values of social evolution are more fluid and can often shift after negative and positive experiences. Moreover, they may be inherently linked to social and familial values. In summary, all three of these build our values and identity framework.
Actually, our values motivate our purposeful action. That is to say, it’s our values that drive us to get out of bed in the morning. In the field of NLP Coaching and Training, we hold values in high regard. Our values often lie deep in our unconscious. Indeed, even though we consciously know some of our values, others rest in the shadows until our emotions expose them. We’re interested in the relationship and individual has with their values. We want to understand if we’re moving towards our values or away from them. If we’re moving away from a value it can often create unhelpful behaviour that is contrary to the behaviour we want to deliver consciously.
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